Should have got up

Warning: What you are about to read is nasty. Very nasty. 

Last Saturday morning around 3:30 a.m. Shiloh began panting and pacing the bedroom.  All I could do was roll over and hope like hell she would go back to bed and this was all a dream.  Around 4 a.m. I could hear dog farts and the room smelled.  Really bad. Enough to make you gag.

I tried to wake Michael up but he’s pretty useless in the middle of the night.  Kind of a hard sleeper and very difficult to wake up. So I took it upon myself to get up and let the farting machine outside to poo. 
Little did I know that when I would step foot out of bed I would step directly in a pile of straight liquid poop. That’s when I realized I should’ve have just got up when she warned me a half hour ago.  But apparently I’m a bad doggy parent and sleep was more important.  I have learned my lesson. 
I’m not going to spare you any details because if I had to deal with it then you have to as well. When I turned on the lights I found that my poor big sweetie had a blow out all over the bedroom.  All around the bed.  Liquid form.  A mess to be cleaned up for sure.  My guy THEN proceed to let her out after my screaming and cussing and I began to dig in on the cleaning process of our brand new carpet at 4 am on a Saturday morning.  Just what I wanted to do. 
I scrubbed and went through more than a dozen old towels.  I gagged.  I scrubbed.  The process repeated over and over.  Dog poop is the smelliest.  
Neither of us could go back upstairs to sleep because the smell was that bad.  So I decided to take over the couch first and he proceeded to lay on the floor with Shiloh after I tried to convince him she should just go in the garage until we know for sure her “illness” is over. He won saying she would be fine and he would let her out if she got up.  Why I ever believed that I have no idea. I love him to death but he wakes up for nothing.  Not even the doors all blown open in the house because of a storm and it is literally raining sideways in the house. True story. 
Sometime in the next few hours I moved back upstairs in the spare bedroom where it didn’t stink too bad because that door had been closed and drifted off to sleep.  The couch was too awful on my back. 
At 8 am when I woke I knew instantly that I was right and she should have went in the garage. Now her blow out was ALL over the house. Up the stairs. Down the hall. In the living room, the front room, the kitchen…….everywhere. 
So rather than spend my Saturday morning at the farmers market like I had planned I cleaned up more poo. New this isn’t a typical way to spend your Friday night or Saturday morning. Because of that I really felt the need to share. So you don’t feel left out of my life….at all. 
Since then you’ll be happy to know that Shiloh is no longer ill. She had many days of rice and boiled chicken. Her tummy is finally back to normal.  The culprit: the entire can of trash she had eaten 48 hours prior which included pizza, steak, potatoes, onion, coffee, peas, and pretzels.  She ate it all.  
Siloh and I have had several long discussions regarding karma and how eating the trash results in an upset tummy. Hopefully she has learned her lesson.  
Faithful Believer in Karma, 
Fortunate Gal (other than cleaning poo) – Ashley

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