Blessed to be planning.

First off….I feel a bit scatter brained as I write tonight and I apologize that I’m all over the place.  Just randomly jotting down some thoughts before bed.

As I sit here planning out holiday food for the weekend and upcoming week, planning out holiday parties, and planning out how to maintain holiday cheer I can’t help but wonder about those who are not as blessed as I am.

Planning is my thing.  I don’t mind doing all this planning.  In fact, I enjoy it.  Sure, it gives me anxiety sometimes.  I think if I didn’t get a little worked up that I  might not feel normal.

What about those who don’t have to worry about planning time with family?  What about those who can’t afford to plan out holiday foods for over 5 gatherings?  What about those who are simply depressed or grieving the loss of a loved one?  Been there.  Done that.

I want to enjoy every moment of Christmas.  I know that it will be here and gone in the blink of an eye. This is my favorite time of year and I can only hope that I will simply take the time to breathe and enjoy time with all of my loved ones.  It can definitely seem like a “job” to schedule the family Christmas celebrations for everyone.  However, it’s all worth it.

I think back over 12 years ago and wonder what life would be like if my mom were still alive.  I know she would make Christmas special like she always seemed to do.  Flawlessly special.  No complaints, just pure joy.  Time for baking cookies.  Time for shopping.  Time for family.  Time for friends.  Time for traditions.

Each Christmas brings a feeling of loss and sadness that she isn’t physically here with us to enjoy it.  I know she’s here with us in spirit.  She’s in the tradition of baking cookies.  She’s in the joy of the littles.  She’s in the sound of the piano keys as I obsessively try and play some tunes I could play flawlessly years ago.  She’s everywhere.

I’m blessed to be planning out food, planning out parties, and planning out time with family.  Each day is a gift, not just the day we get loads of gifts.  We all have to be reminded of that sometimes.

This holiday season I wish you all the blessings of planning.  May you enjoy your family and friends time together without stress and simply take it all in.  Be in the moment.

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