Out West Part 1

July 25, 2015January 23, 2018 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Our trip out west was awesome. Now, it wasn’t a sandy beach with tropical weather….but there is something just as breathtaking about the beautiful mountains and nature that Idaho, Wyoming, and Montana have to offer.

The trip started a little rough, I’m not going to lie. The night before we were scheduled to leave Mike couldn’t figure out why we couldn’t get “checked in” with United Airlines through Orbitz. Finally, he gave up and figured he would try again in the morning since our flight wasn’t suppose to leave until 5 pm. The next morning it was his first task to accomplish and roughly about an hour or two after waking up (still in my pjs) he informs me that our flight is leaving at 2 pm, not 5.

I took a deep breath and made a mad dash for the shower and to finish packing. I didn’t shed one tear, which is quite an accomplishment for me these days. I was ready to go in 45 minutes and luckily our ride to the airport (FIL) was over at the house in an hour to get us to the airport. I did take a quick minute to call Orbitz and scream my head off at some foreigner who proceeded to tell me, “it happens” and they were sorry. Sorry?!?! I’m just glad my husband thought to call or we definitely would have missed our flights. Oh, and I originally booked a flight with one layover and now this one had two. We had to go to Chicago BEFORE we landed in Denver to then fly again to Sun Valley.

And wouldn’t you know it that Denver was having some rough weather so we were late getting to Denver because we flew AROUND the storm? Of course!

However, everyone’s flights were delayed in Denver….so we didn’t miss the second flight to our final destination. We were suppose to arrive in Sun Valley/Hailey, Idaho around 8 pm and finally made it in around 11 pm. It was definitely a long day and my swollen feet were seriously unhappy with me….but we made it.

Side note – Do you know how many moms fly alone with little babies? A lot! I was way more observant of this than ever before. I was shocked. There is no way I think I could ever do that by myself. Those babies were perfect, too! A few tears but mostly sleeping and seriously awesome little campers for a long day of flying.

Unfortunately we got to the quaint little town of Hailey, Idaho when it was pretty darn dark so we saw next to nothing the night we arrived.

But when we woke up the next morning….WOW. My bro and sis-in-law have an incredible property in the mountains. Right now they are in the process of building their dream home on this property and her dad and sister are there to help this summer. We’ve seen pictures through text along the way but it didn’t hold a candle to the scenery they get to wake up to every morning.

Here are a few pictures of their house coming along.

Guest cabin

Mountain outside their deck

View from their bedroom

Inside look at the loft and the stairs leading up

Kitchen

By the time we left they had installed the deck door here but I forgot a pic!

There’s the deck door. This is also the camper they are living in while they build.

Just out their driveway

The next day we all packed up and headed to Stanley, Idaho. Along the way we made some pit stops to take a look around and see some fabulous scenery of beautiful Idaho.

There are hot springs EVERYWHERE out west and here’s one of them.
That’s my brother-in-law, David, testing the waters.

and his lovely white legs

Isn’t my husband adorable?

I have just about given up on being cute while pregnant.
The scale hasn’t changed a whole lot but boy I feel huge.
And I know it’s only going to get worse!

This overlook was incredible.

Look at that bump.
Everything is getting larger…ya hear?

Here’s my sis-in-law, Louise, her dad Rich/Dick/Richard/Funny Old Man, and her sweet sweet sister Elaine

Brothers

We stopped at Red Fish Lake on the way.
Beautiful lake and LOTS of kiddos swimming in some super cold water.
They even had a dog beach for Judy and VooDoo!

Judy’s their sweet stinky dog.
She’s a lot like Shiloh.

Meeting other dogs on the beach.

Judy and VooDoo

Here’s another hot spring in Stanley, Idaho.
Of course, being pregnant, it was one of the many things I couldn’t enjoy on the trip.
I’m definitely traveling back out west without a fetus so I can horseback ride, maybe whitewater rafting, and enjoy some hot springs.

Here’s the cabin we stayed at in Idaho and the boys grilling dinner.
We had delicious trout!

This was looking out behind our cabin.
A beautiful cattle ranch on the Salmon River.

There’s always part of vacations where the husband wants to do something that totally interests him and sounds terribly boring to me. I love him dearly so I roll my eyes and go with the flow for a bit to see his eyes sparkle and his smile shine.

This was that part.

The dredge.

He can probably tell you way more about it than I can because I had to pee most of the tour and couldn’t pay attention. I was also terribly bored and wanted to stick a fork in my eye.

Basically it’s a huge machine that works like a CoinStar except they were looking for gold.
He would kill me for explaining it like that, but that’s how I understood it.

Looking sexy at the dredge waiting to hear where the bathroom is.

The rest of these pics were totally my husband. I have no freakin clue what they are but I know he wants to show his buddies….sooo……scroll down til something sparks your interest.

Then we stopped at a ghost town, Custer.

It use to be a hopping little town for those who worked on the dredge and now it’s nothing.

BUT, you can walk through some of the buildings which is really neat and see what life use to be like.

Kind of reminds me of Conner Prairie, without the cool people to reenact.

I wanted to see inside this house until a rodent crawled across the floor, then I was out.

Children’s graves who had been lost in an avalanche.

Still taking work calls.
The man never stops.

Loved looking at these horses outside of the cabin.

That’s all for now!

After Hailey and Stanley, Idaho we headed up to Idaho Falls and Yellowstone….part 2 later!

Truly Fortunate for a Beautiful Vacation,

Book Talk: Motherless Mothers

July 25, 2015 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

“There is an emptiness inside of me — a void that will never be filled. No one in your life will ever love you as your mother does. There is no love as pure, unconditional and strong as a mother’s love. And I will never be loved that way again.”
― Hope Edelman, Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss

It took me years to complete Motherless Daughters. Years. It was a tough read and I jumped around and read what I needed.

Recently on vacation I finished the book Motherless Mothers which I had started as soon as I found out I was pregnant. At first it was way too tough to read but gradually it got easier.

The fact is….I’m about to be a motherless mother. Whether I want it to happen or not, it’s happening. It’s tragic and it majorly sucks but I’m the type who likes to read books to deal with things or learn about things and this book did exactly that. I’m dealing with this situation better than I was before because I read Hope Edelman’s book.

i learned that becoming a mother meant mourning all over again. When I was 17 and lost my mom the furthest thing from my mind was getting married and having children. The thought hadn’t crossed my mind that I would someday be a motherless mother. I couldn’t mourn that loss because it was too far away. Now it’s happening. I’m more scared for the time following his birth than now. Now I can maintain my emotions and I’m only taking care of myself. When I have a meltdown or bawl like a baby and want to curl up and die….I can (minus the dying part). After he arrives I can’t just break down I have to take care of him and I’m not just going to be taking care of myself anymore.

The first person I wanted to share my news with after I told my husband was my mom. After all this time she is still the one I want to share my news with. Seems crazy. I mean, my goodness, this December it will be 14 years since she has been gone. Yet she’s still the one I want to run and tell everything to.

I’ve learned that having my first child is, in general, a time of immense uncertainty. I feel most days like I’m acting more like a child than an adult and regressing just a bit. Just before our vacation I had an entire day of meltdowns to the point where I curled up and didn’t want to leave the bed. I really didn’t want to go on the vacation or leave town. I’m very glad that I did…but at that point in time I didn’t want to leave my room or my bed.

Probably one of the hardest things (and always has been) is seeing other women with their mothers. It’s just a painful reminder. I have an amazing group of women who have been there for me since I lost my own mom. Unfortunately, it’s just not the same. I don’t want anyone to try and replace her. It’s just not even possible. I tend to get very angry seeing mothers help friends become mothers. Or hearing about mothers getting ready for their own grandchildren. I get angry because that will never be a possibility for me. And it sucks. This pregnancy has just magnified an already existing problem of me seeing women with their mothers. I will probably forever be a “wishful thinker” missing her emotional support and even her practical help like babysitting, information, and sharing her own personal pregnancy stories.

I never got the chance to talk to my mom about her own pregnancy with me. I can’t believe I didn’t ask those questions when she was around. It just never crossed my mind. I hate that. I wish I knew how long she was in labor for with me. I wish I knew if the birth was fast and easy or painful and slow. There’s just so much I wish I knew. As Edelman puts it, “it’s helpful to have a blueprint for comparison as the trimesters progress.” I have no blueprint from my own mother. Yup, that sucks too.

I imagine that my mom would have eagerly anticipated another grand baby and been waiting after each prenatal visit for a text or phone call for me to report an update. Right now my husband is amazing and attends every visit with me and occasionally I send my sister or best friend an update but she isn’t there waiting for an update. It’s rough each time I leave because besides my best friend and sister there’s still something missing. I want to call her. No one can replace that.

According to the novel, “79% of women admitted to having a gender preference during their pregnancies.” I’m one of those. I will fully admit that although a healthy baby was exactly what I wanted I also wanted pink balloons to fly out of that box. In fact I had convinced myself that it would be a girl simply because I wanted him to be. This book helped explain to me why I wanted it to be a girl so badly. I was longing to replace or relive that mother daughter bond in my life by having my own little girl. This was a major lightbulb moment for me. It actually made me feel better about wanting a girl so bad and being just a little bit bummed when we found out. I hope that someday I will get the chance to have my little girl and have that mother daughter bond…there’s really no telling. I certainly don’t want to be greedy, I just miss that bond and having a relationship where my mom was my best friend is something I truly wish to share with my own daughter some day.

In just a few months (I can hardly believe it) I’ll be in the labor and delivery room. I’m scared of this part. I want to have my husband and my sister there as my support team to ease my fears. I wish my mom could be there, of course, but I know that my husband and sister will tag team and keep me calm and comfortable the best they can. I’m fearful of all sorts of things. Things you probably can’t even imagine or wonder why in the heck I would worry about that. It’s just what I do. Sudden loss does that to people. I know I’ll be sad. I hope it doesn’t consume the day that’s suppose to be so wonderful as our first child enters the world but I’m sure at some point….I will be sad.

Poetpartum? Yes, I’m worried about that too. I think our timing is great because I will be soaring through the holidays with the new bambino and what is not to love about a new baby and Christmas? But after Christmas I always get the winter blues when the excitement is over and the overload of family time fades.

I’m worried about colic. I’m worried that breastfeeding won’t be successful. I’m just worried it won’t be picture perfect in our house once we bring him home. I know, deep down, that it won’t be. I also know, deep down, that it’s going to be totally okay if it isn’t. No one is perfect and probably more so than that….no first time parents are perfect either.

Probably the hardest part to read was about the absent grandmother. This little guy will have a ton of loving and caring women in his life that will treat him so special but that doesn’t replace her. I plan to talk about Mamaw Debbie and let him know all about her. I want him to know what she looks like and talk to her just like his momma does. I want him to ask all the questions in the world to find out more about her. I don’t want her to absent in any way but her physical presence. I want him to feel her around him all the time and know he has his very own guardian angel. He has a grandmother in heaven and not everyone is “lucky” enough to have their own guardian angel.

This book was like a knight in shining armor that saved me from my worries. They are all still there but I have coping mechanisms to deal with them and someone (Hope Edelman) who gets it. Someone who gets it and has shared stories from other motherless mothers as well. She wrote several other chapters I read that I haven’t discussed her……. about all the years of being a parent up until sending him off to college and I plan to look back quite often for help and guidance. I’m also super fortunate to have an amazing big sister with advice to get me through.

Through all this I want to thank YOU, the reader, for just listening to me. I’m not asking for your sympathy or advice but just thank you for being an “ear” to “listen” as I travel on this path to being a motherless mother.

It’s a…..BOY!

July 11, 2015January 23, 2018 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Wow, baby boy, you sure are loved so much already. Look at all these people who showed up last night just to see if you were a girl or boy.

You literally had a whole “team” on your side and even those, like your momma, who wore pink wishing for bows and tutus will love you just as much. They were just trying to support your momma who truly wanted to over rule your poppa and flood him with estrogen. Maybe next time! 😉

It was so fun having so many of our loved ones around to find out what you would be. We were hoping to have this little party in our back yard where you will spend time running like a wild man eventually. However, this summer in Indiana has been nothing but rain and we had another crappy weather day. I don’t feel nearly as bad for myself and not having our party there as I do all those farmers we love so dearly.

Of course we had a few of our favorite little people who really wanted to help us open the box….Brody and Willow. You see, they were married the same day we were and thought it was only right.

At this point I was so nervous about opening this box I truly thought I was going to puke everywhere.

And then it was time to open!

and OH MY GOODNESS I was definitely shocked when those blue balloons popped out.

I thought for sure you were a girl!

Check out momma’s face.

Seriously shocked.

But so happy!

and I instantly wanted to find that ultrasound pic to see what the tech was so “confident” about!

And then there was the “turtle” they claimed we would see.

And yup, it looks like a turtle.

Look at your daddy’s face. He is so stinkin proud.

And this one below is where I figure out your cousin, Shailynn, is not so happy about having another boy cousin. I felt really bad, but there is nothing I could do!

Mommy and Daddy are happy!

and so are your grandparents!

Notice how all the grandparents wore blue. They wanted you pretty badly!

I couldn’t have pulled it all off without a BUNCH of my favorite women and definitely this one, my best friend, for allowing us to backtrack from her clean party barn and make it happen. She has a little guy too who will probably teach you all the bad things you need to know!

Kynsey’s excited!

The happily married couples!

Here’s a photo of your future wife (inside Melissa’s belly) who should arrive in this great big world about the same time as you. We’ve already arranged your marriages. You’re welcome!

Now all I can think about is your nursery and all the little things I want you to have and how I can get ready for your arrival. 20 weeks away!

I can’t stop thinking about watching you and your dad outside in the barn working on things. I can’t wait to watch him teach you everything he knows….and he knows a LOT about fixing things and building things. You are truly one lucky little boy to have a dad like him.

I can’t wait to love on you and snuggle you, my very own little boy. I’m excited to welcome you to this world.

I know that despite the difficulties that come with this last name it’s very important for a family name to be carried on, and you will carry it on well my little man.

There are great big things in this world that are waiting for you and I can’t wait to show you them all.

Love,

Your Truly Fortunate Momma

Happy July!

July 1, 2015 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

July means….

1. Hopefully tons of pool time. Come on weather. I need you to cooperate. Not just for me but mainly for my farmer family and friends. Enough with the rain and out with the sun. Crops need to dry but grow a bit more and I need a better tan too!

2. We get to find out what the baby is! The tiny party is planned for our immediate family and few friends. We have the box to hide the balloons in and food is all set up! Next Wednesday I will probably be very impatient. In the morning the dr will know BUT we will not know. Then we will take the note to our friend Jennifer at the local flower shop and it will be her job to fill the box with the right color of balloons! That night we will gather outside and see what this bambino is. I can’t wait! I’m a major planner so I’m totally ready for this next phase of planning…..nursery decor, registry, the works. So exciting!

3. KTs wedding! Can’t wait for my good friend KT to come home and marry the love of her life…..Ruud. It is going to be a beautiful wedding and so much fun!

4. We are traveling out West to see my bro and sis- in law and glamp at Yellowstone. 8 days out west! We will spend most of our time in Idaho with them but plan to venture off for a couple of days around our 1 year anniversary to glamp in beautiful Yellowstone. I cannot wait to see Mother Nature at its finest. Most of you know I miss, terribly, living in the country. I can’t wait to see what true country life means. The beautiful mountains and amazing wildlife and plants.

And ONE year? How has it really already been one year. It seems like yesterday. Sure we’ve had some pretty difficult challenges in this first year but it still doesn’t seem like 12 months has passed! He’s definitely my forever even on the days I slam doors and pout. He knows it’s just the fetus talking. I’ll never be able to tell him how thankful I am for the changes he made for our family. I can’t imagine where we would be without that big step he took.

Sure it’s no Yellowstone but that cruise to the Bahamas was a grand way to kick off our wedded bliss baby….

And lastly and LEASTLY

I’m not even acknowledging what the end of the month brings. I will NOT get depressed this year about the start of school. Too many exciting things to come in the fall.

At least I’m going to tell myself I won’t get depressed.

Wish me luck on that. I love my job but I tend to get pretty weepy when I know my extensive time with family and friends is winding down.

If we could just all live on a compound together that would be great. I’d be a much happier person and my husband probably would go crazy.

Oh July…..LET’S DO THIS!

16 weeks

June 11, 2015 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Finding out about this little fetus around 6 weeks and looking back……has it really been 10 weeks since then?

Apparently it has!

Last week we heard the babies heartbeat and our doctor has a hard time keeping up with the babes movement because he or she kept moving around. She called our baby “very active.” Oh great!

I lost two pounds in between appointments and my husband threw me under the bus and made sure to tell my doc I was eating popcorn for dinner.

Trust me, I know better but for some reason dinner is my struggle. At this point in the day I am very nauseous and nothing sounds good. The last thing I want to do is cook and even my favorite reputations don’t sound great. Food just doesn’t sound good. Occasionally I could get down some popcorn so I figured that was better than nothing. Apparently not.

I’m working on the eating part and ice cream and slushies (particular Tuttle’s strawberry) are my cravings most days.

This heat is brutal and I’m starting to feel pregnant as in overweight and large. Got myself a little hard pooch (as opposed to my soft one before) and getting up and down our stairs leads me to huffing and puffing. I need to keep up my love of walking but that’s going to require early mornings or late nights and then consuming even more calories that already don’t sound good.

My apps and book say 3 different things for this week. The baby is either the size of a dill pickle, lemon, or avocado. I think they relate the baby to foods just to make me feel more nauseous.

I’m avoiding telling you about the really nasty gross perks of pregnancy. I save all those for telling my husband. He wrinkles his nose and shakes his head but deep down I know he loves it. He’s just as gross so who cares. He’s a man!

Just less than a month and we find out what bambino is. Going to keep it a secret all day and take the news to our local florist. We will have her put balloons in a box and have a reveal that night with some family and friends at our house. Can’t wait for that!

Telling the littles

May 11, 2015January 23, 2018 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Hiding our news from the little people in my life has been REALLY hard. I’ve wanted to tell them but knowing it wasn’t totally “safe” yet kept me from sharing our news. I also wanted to tell them in a fun way and it was perfect that it fell around the time of our family game night with the Ruttans.

It was hard to find a “game” to tell them but I decided on some good ole fashioned balloon popping. They were actually excited to pop balloons!

Inside each balloon was a word for the final message, “You’re going to be big cousins.”

Check out their reaction here!

I’m so fortunate to have had these 3 in my life and prepare me, somewhat, for what motherhood will be like. Uncle Mike and Aunt Addie love you all very much and we look forward to you showing our little one the ways of life in the family.

I love that Brody has named the baby Rosy Flower in hopes it will be a girl.

I love that Kynsey giggled uncontrollably when I showered her the ultrasound pictures and wanted to know every detail of the gender reveal party.

I love that Brayden and Kendyl were so excited and even said, “that’s unbelievable!”

All our special little ones are excited to be a part of our little ones life which only means one thing…..this baby is already Fortunate. Already blessed.

So very fortunate,

We’ve got big news!

May 10, 2015January 23, 2018 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Mother’s Day has never been that easy since 2001 but today I can’t quite get the smile off of my face. I’m so excited to tell the world that we’ve been blessed with the gift of becoming parents….in November!

It’s been difficult to “blog” since finding out because it’s hard to talk about anything without blabbing about our great news.

So, let’s start from the beginning.

Since July last year we’ve “tried” to join the parent’s club. We shared in sadness almost every single month when things just hadn’t quite been in the timing we had hoped. We heard of others getting pregnant and I shed a few tears because I’m extremely impatient and wanted my moment NOW.

I received gifts of encouragement from friends. Thanks Patti!

I tracked my temperature daily and just about ran out of ovulation tests. I tried the electronic and cheapy ones. (fyi….the cheap ones are the way to go)

I waited for those smiley faces.

I used an app and told my husband exactly when the magic had to happen. It almost became stressful.

Scratch that, I totally made it stressful.

We prayed.

We prayed a lot.

I cried.

I cried a lot.

And then one weekend we went on a long hike in Brown County and I though, “man I am really out of breath.” I had taken a test that was negative but still had some early symptoms and kept pushing them aside.

Too many times had I felt like I had the right symptoms and had proven wrong.

Monday of Spring Break rolls around and Mike heads off to work. I hopped out of bed and decided….what the heck. May as well try.

Then I was in total bawling, freaking out shock when that little faint line appeared.

So I did what every single girl does. I told the dog and then panicked that the line wasn’t dark enough so I facetimed my baby making expert friend, Melissa. Her sweet little boys answered and I screamed, “get mommy! I think I have something to show her!” She ran to the screen with makeup all splotched on her face and said “show me now!” I showed her and she confirmed it. I was pregnant!

I wanted to call my husband so bad but I also wanted to tell him in person. So I told the dog some more. She seemed to not care one bit.

That day I ran some errands and picked up a few things. I might have stopped at Barnes and Nobles to use up some gifts cards…

I also might have stopped at Babies R Us just to look around and buy something for my gift to daddy.

I sat on the couch nervous and excited and waited for Mike to come home from work. He sat down and told stories about his day as I listened patiently acting like nothing was up.

Finally, I told him I had been crafting all day and asked if he wanted to see what I had made.

It was quite fun to tell my husband he was going to be a daddy. You can watch below.

His tears were exactly what I needed. I had wanted to tell him all day long on the phone but I was so glad that I had waited.

I had always saved the ring box he proposed to me with and used that to put in a pacifier.

That night (March 16, 2015) we wanted to shout to the world our good news, but I already knew that wasn’t a great idea.

We’ve waited as long as we can to tell everyone. We’ve heard our little cherubs heartbeat twice and we continue to pray that this pregnancy is successful.

The first time we heard the heartbeat we both cried. It’s just the most incredible feeling to hear that heartbeat and see the little “bean” that is growing inside of you.

Last week we were able to see the progress and growth of our little one. I’m still in shock by the change!

My best friend was so kind and gracious to help us get some pictures done for our big announcement. They turned out wonderful and we did the best we could with a crazy dog!

I promise to get back to regular blogging. I have so much tell you about the joys of becoming a mother….the nausea, exhaustion, mood swings, and more! I doubt I’ll hold back much though I’m sure my future children wish I would.

It’s just too exciting not to tell you it ALL.

You can thank me later!

Two more pics I created with ideas from pinterest…… These are things I’ve already learned that I’ll do for baby #1 but probably not ever again, so why not, right?

AND I received my first ever Mother’s Day present this morning. I cried. Maybe it was the hormones or maybe it was because I was so stoked my husband recognized that. He’s a busy guy right now so it’s so nice to be thought of.

So incredibly fortunate,

Weird.

February 22, 2015 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Ever wake up and immediately try and recall what you ate because your dreams were so bizarre?

Ever told your husband and he had equally as weird dreams?

No?

Ok. Maybe just us.

So last night I got little to no sleep due to some extremely weird dreams.

They all revolved around my husband leaving the baby. The baby that we don’t have. It was a boy, by the way. He left the baby on the bed. And then of course it rolled off. He left the baby in the car. He left the baby by itself in public. He kept leaving our nonexistent baby everywhere.

What does that even mean?

My husband’s dreams involved the dog. In his dream he pulled the dog’s paws off. He said it wasn’t bloody, but real disgusting. Since then he’s been adoring Shiloh all day apologizing for having such an awful dream about he removal of her very important paws.

Are we totally screwed up, or what?

Happy Sunday!

Idiots

February 9, 2015 / ashleyeileenp / 1 Comment

Two people come to mind this afternoon when I hear that word

1. Governor Pence

It’s very disrespectful to say such a harsh word about an elected government official. I get it. I’m a little bit sorry, and a whole lot not sorry.

The fact that he has made a declaration today to shorten our state testing sounds fabulous. He steps in as a hero and everyone thanks him for taking care of the problem. However, if he thinks I’m a fool to fall for this crap…..he’s crazy.

I think he had this all planned out. He planned the “swoop in and save” move to get in better graces with the educators crew. He’s probably even got a shorter test already made and copies ran to smooth the whole deal out.

You’re not fooling me, sir.

Idiot.

2) Kanye West

So many reasons not enough energy to waste on you.

Mostly it’s that you married that other idiot, Kim.

Also because you want to believe your opinion in the music industry is the only one that should matter. Get a clue Kanye, you’re not the Almighty.

I must say I feel better.

I apologize for venting.

Happy Monday y’all.

Dear Birthday Twin

February 7, 2015January 23, 2018 / ashleyeileenp / Leave a comment

Dear Birthday Twin,

9 years ago when you came into this world I never knew how much I could love someone else who I had to share the same day with. I know you totally understand that, because…..well…..we are basically one in the same.

Over the years I’ve become more accustomed to sharing our special day together, and quite frankly, I really can’t imagine it any other way now.

Being in the delivery room on the day you were born kept e

Celebrating at all your birthday parties has always been the best.

When I’m 90 do you promise to drive me to Olive Garden for the must do birthday dinner?

You’ve always been so fun to dress and play with.

A true princess no doubt.

The day your parents left you with me and I decided to try on all your baby bikinis was definitely my favorite…..until you peed all over the chair and I knew I was in trouble.

Your chubby self just smiled and drooled.

My partner in crime.

I’m very grateful your mom has always included me on special days.

Things like venturing off to a princess tea party all dressed up.

I’m a very lucky aunt to be a part of all that.

And because we have the best BEST friends in the world I get to spoil your best friend too.

She’s like a niece, but not technically, and I love that you’re okay with that. wink wink 🙂

Then Brody came into your world to throw things out of alignment.

I love this picture because you were so stinkin excited to have a sibling.

Some days you might want to reflect back on this pic to remind you how truly adorable and funny he is. 🙂

You’ve been trying new things like crazy lately, and that’s just another of the million reasons I love you.

Throwing yourself out there to see what you like.

Conquering this world one day at a time.

Our 4-H fun is what makes the summer the best.

That and those pool days at my house.

You’re an amazing baker, crafter, and sewer.

Always remember how incredibly talented you are!

I haven’t made it out this year, but I will soon….promise.

I always learn so much about life when it’s just me and you.

Those are my best days.

Lunch at your school.

Lunch or shopping on a Saturday.

Our best days together are just you and me and our sassy selves.

My goodness you were cute, right?

Your eyes just light up a room.

Big and beautiful eyes to sparkle and shine.

And your attitude.

Well, it’s like 99% awesome and 1% like me.

Or, maybe a little more one way or another.

Either way, your attitude is what makes you YOU.

It’s what will make you an incredibly strong woman.

Strong enough to conquer whatever you choose to do in life.

Your beauty is incredible.

And your love for Relay and helping the world.

I know that by next year you will totally be capable of running Relay if you so choose.

I’m fully ready to pass that down to you as soon as you want.

Your passion for things that I love always excites me.

Your goofiness.

I ask you to pose for a picture.

You do.

Then, you ask if it’s going on social media.

Most likely….yes.

Because I totally want the world to know I have the most rockin’ niece around!

And lastly…the head flower girl of my dreams.

You led the pack down that aisle (all but one) with fierceness and beauty.

You knew your duties and never failed to amaze me.

You stood by my side as I married my best friend and quickly asked to call him Unkie Mike….or Unkie Bert.

We would be very blessed to bring a baby into this world with a cousin like you.

No, we would be EXTREMELY blessed.

I know you’ll take care of my own like they were your siblings.

You see….we are just incredibly lucky that YOU were born 9 years ago.

To end, I want you to know that I hope that 20 or 30 or 50 years from now you choose me to spend just a little of your day with. Because quite frankly, there is no better gift than to spend time with you on this day.